I just went through something I want to share with the rest of you. I turned down an opportunity that was very likely to make me good money. Yes…even in this market.
For the last few weeks I’ve been speaking to someone who wanted to work with me on a new project he’s thinking of starting. I have the specialized subject matter expertise and he knows how to take that expertise and put it to work…to earn real money. I can’t tell you exactly what the project is, but it was no fly-by-night scheme. I have no doubt if I said yes that we would make money. And believe me…I am NOT opposed to making money.
So what went into my thinking and what finally made me say no?
I have no delusion that work is anything but that. Sure we want it to be fun, but to get to the fun there are often a lot of hills and mountains to climb…especially when you’re starting a new business. But the more I learned about the process and what my days would be spent doing – all necessary to build the business – I had trouble seeing much if anything that would be enjoyable.
Still, for the right goal, sometimes the joy is simply in taking on a challenge, climbing those hills and mountains, and, especially with the right partner, celebrating successes along the way. And that was pretty much how I had envisioned this particular project.
The Turning Point For Me
Then I found out that my idea of quality and my partner’s were very different. The end product as my partner envisioned it would be making money. But the product itself – apart form the income – would not be something I would be proud of. And the thought of spending the next couple years dedicated to something that at the end I would only feel so-so about, stopped me in my tracks.
We all have different reasons for saying yes. But for me, after many weeks of discussions leading up to my decision, it came down to my need to believe in what I am doing. And as much as I could use some extra income, I have to trust myself enough to know there will be other ways – ways that are more in synch with who I am as a person.
I am not a pure idealist. When you need money to pay the rent, you take a job. But even then, in my experience, there is simple work you can feel good about or the kind that makes your gut twinge just a little bit. I have always tried to choose the former and have never regretted the choice – even for jobs that were less than ideal!
I assume many of you can relate. Would love to hear some of your yes or no work decisions.
Dear Ronnie,
Talk about swimming against the tide…..thanks so much for sharing your story. It’s an important one in a climate where fear in many guises (many understandable) prevails.
For many of us, raising our standards in times of apparent scarcity seems frivolous – and as you point out – isn’t possible. But it is so important for us to stay conscious and connected to our values and who we really are – and what we truly want. Losing sight of that is a danger that can erode our spirits and limit our contributions.
Thanks for your example which can serve as a North Star for us all.
Thanks, Louise!
You wrote: “it is so important for us to stay conscious and connected to our values and who we really are – and what we truly want.” Nicely said. BTW…I’m a huge fan of your blog about workplace communication and leadership.
I totally agree. I am working to re-vamp my life, finances and time so that I have the freedom to say ‘no’ or ‘enough” and not have to worry about paying the bills. Good for you!
So nice to see you JCNY! Thanks for the support. My best to you in your own goals and dreams.
Thanks for this. I just finished my first year in business and am reviewing my goals for the upcoming year.
I am proud (and somewhat surprised because there were some deep valleys mid-year) that I met most of the ones I set and am wondering what is next for me as far as what I want to pursue in yr 2. The left brained part of me wants to pursue big, lofty goals again and talk to lots of people, but my gut is telling me something different, but not sure what. Your post reminds me that is okay and I should take time to think it through. Thanks!
I really appreciate what your going through, Tracy. Your career goes for the rest of your life, and I think works best when it’s built on a solid foundation of values and being true to your inner voice. For some more thoughts on career paths: The Non-Linear Path to Happiness at Work
Best of luck!
This is so relevant to situations I keep coming across with people who I want to work with, but don’t even come close to the same expectation of quality that I have. I honestly can’t work on anything for a second if I don’t think it’ll be amazing, so choosing business partners has been an ever-evolving lesson for me too. Especially when, in reality, I’m a content creator and the one doing most of the work.
Thanks, Amanda. I know what you mean. In my experience, most places can’t ever match our expectations – many so far away I can’t believe they stay in business. But I’ve learned to be happy with say only 92.57%.
I wish you much luck finding great business partners.
Hi Ronnie!
Been a minute! An inbox from an old post lured me back
This was a great article. Its so hard to turn down work. I recently had to turn down a job b/c they wanted to me to use my car (an average of 80 miles a day) for about 32k a year and I would have to write mileage off on my taxes. Yes I need a job but my car already has over the mileage it should have from working a similar job for 6 years. I had to weigh the pros and cons. I asked if they had an office position that paid that or even less. They didn’t so I had to pass. Its hard but in the long run I felt peace with my choice so I knew I made the right call. Things aren’t great for me but they could be worse if my car goes down and I can’t fix it or afford another one
Hi NikkiP!
So good to see you again. Thanks for the kind words. I so get your decision…but know it’s hard letting something go – especially when you need a job. Sorry you had to say no, but glad you found peace with your decision. Thanks for sharing this with us.
And of course…I wish you MUCH luck finding a great office job nearby soon!
Hello Ronnie,
Before i start narrating my story, i would like to apologize in advance for the length of my narrative.
So here goes my situation and i will really appreciate any advice.
I have about 2-4 years work experience and i was back in the job market sometime in the middle of the year. My job experience is in a field which i am pretty good at, but i developed a passion in a different field over the years and i went back to school and re-trained by getting an advanced degree (Masters) in the new area i had developed a passion for but had no prior job experience in this area. This new field is somewhat related to my previous educational background and job experience. So i interviewed with company A for a position in the new field i was passionate about and got an offer which i did not negotiate and accepted. My offer was later revised and increased a little based on Labor law rules in the US for non-immigrant workers with advanced degree. I should have done my homework to see how much i was really worth, but at that point, i just wanted a job and was really excited about the prospect of working in this new area. After the revision due to the Labor laws, i got a feeling i was low balled in terms of compensation by the initial offer and decided to continue interviewing while my paperwork with company A was on-going. So i recently got an offer with company B (Bigger and well known) in the field directly related to my job experience, so pretty much i got an intermediate level position which is an upward movement for me in terms of compensation also. Now i am stuck on deciding what to do. Should i go with company A (mid-sized) that offered me a junior level position because i do not have prior job experience in the exact field, but i am passionate about the job, or go with company B offering me an upward career growth opportunity, in a field i have job experience in, but i’m not as passionate about compared to the position in company A? Not to mention, i am not happy at being short balled by company A, though i admit its my responsibility to negotiate which i did not. I really enjoy doing the type of work i will be doing in company A, but my compensation disregarded my previous work experience (though they are somewhat (say 10%) related). Company B will be offering about 10K to 15K per year more, but don’t like the work AS MUCH as i like the work i will be doing in company A. what are my options?
Hi Andrew!
Thanks for warning me about the long question.
I do ask people to please keep them SHORT!!!
I can’t tell you what to do, but I can ask you why, after all that effort to change careers and follow your passion, you would consider going back to something you want less? Career change often involves less money for a while in exchange for a chance to build your new skills. And then it also makes for an easier transition of older “transferable” skills for the rest of your career.
This is just the beginning. Is the only thing stopping you fear that maybe just maybe they took advantage” of you? They are also taking a chance on you. (Plus they did show good faith in upping the amount a bit.) It’s up to you to prove them right and then negotiate for what you’re worth after you prove it! If not…you’re building your resume for the future. If you look behind you and worry about what you didn’t get, you may miss the future. Salary now is not the key to a rich future. You are the key – and the way you look at things.
BUT…if there is a part of you that really doesn’t want this new job or new direction after all (apart from the salary), then ask yourself why and act from that knowledge. Best of luck!
Hi Ronnie,
I think saying yes to a particular career, job or line of work we should consider multiple expectations and how they weigh up against each other, for example in a career – you could expect, Salary, Challenge, Fun, Environment, People and Support, Benefits, Flexibility and Passion.
If it ticks all boxes then obviously it’s a winner, we often feel that the role is ‘not right’ even if the money is good because other areas of our expectations have not been met as mentioned above.
Everyones standards and expectations are different. Right now I have the opportunity for a 50% payrise by switching to contracting jobs or Project management, but its missing the Passion/Challenge peices in the field I desire.
I put much more weighting on Passion, Challenge and Environment than on Salary for example…this allows me to travel down the path that I feel strongly about.
Be happy first and the rest will come
cheers
Gordon
I love your comment, Gordon. Nicely said. Thank you for sharing that!