Interview doldrums got you down? Didn’t get the job offer you wanted? Got the bad interview blues? Does “I didn’t get the job” feel like your new mantra?
Although I wish with all my heart you would get the job offer you want every time you interview and then be the one who gets to decide whether to accept the job or not, sometimes you just didn’t get the job offer – even if you’re totally qualified. Instead, you got a polite turn down or a cool rejection letter…or worse yet, you heard nothing back from them. Waiting. Waiting some more. In deep silence. No phone call. No e-mail. No rejection letter. No response at all. Crickets chirping. Grrrr.
And you can’t help wondering “Why don’t they like me? What did I do wrong in my interview? Why didn’t I get an offer even after a really good interview?” And it hurts. You feel utterly frustrated by the whole hiring process!
But apart from just not having the right skills or there being someone so exactly suited to the job even a perfect candidate like you has to be turned down, what kinds of things might have gotten in the way of a job offer or even a second interview? Let’s see if these tips can help you with your next interview!
Things that can turn a job interview cold – and get you rejected!
- Low energy
- Vague answers
- Way too talkative or way too quiet
- Not listening well and instead answering what you feel like saying
- Not offering strong examples of things you’ve done well
- Arriving late
- Dressing inappropriately
- Acting unprofessionally and/or overly friendly
- Poor eye contact or body language (too stiff, too shlumpy)
- You act the way you think they’d want you to and aren’t being yourself
Any of this sound familiar? Good news is you can work on any or all of these things and come to the next interview prepared with your best interview posture, good eye contact, fully-engaged energy, great stories about things you’ve made happen, etc.
Of course, there’s also the possibility it wasn’t a bad interview after all. Maybe they simply hired someone else from the company they already knew and the posting was just protocol. Or there just wasn’t any chemistry. This happens sometimes. In either of these particular cases (other than staying in touch) there’s really nothing you can do; you just need to put this behind you and move on. As in a dating relationship, when it’s not right, best to let it go and look for one that works.
An interview is never over until it’s over
One note: Even if you get the feeling the interview is going south or was never a real interview to begin with, you still want to give your strongest, most naturally likable interview no matter what. Don’t decide to reject them before they reject you.
Why? Because there may be someone you meet during the process who remembers you for another time. In fact, I just recommended someone I met a year ago who was wrong for that job but may be exactly right for the position they’re looking to fill now. It always pays to turn on your best interview charm until you are out the door – and out of the building. Remember…each person you meet counts. Even impressions made on receptionists or doormen matter!
Whether it’s a job interview or anything else – all you can do is your best
If you don’t get the job, it just wasn’t meant to be – at least not this time. Use each rejection as a chance to redouble your determination to get the next one. Or the one after that. Your job is coming.
But…if you aren’t sure you’re interviewing at the top of your game, this is definitely a chance to brush up your resume (may open up different types of jobs) as well as your interview skills. For interview help, you might find these earlier posts helpful:
15 Things I Look for When I Interview People
The Single Most Important Thing in Any Job Interview
Good luck! Hope you find a job you love.
~ Ronnie Ann
Do you have any stories about your own interviews? Did you ever feel the room go cold?
A great list, Ronnie Ann! And while it indeed serves to explain why someone may not get a job, it’s an even better reminder list to read before going into an interview. That way, you can avoid the mistakes that can sink an interview—and a job offer.
A great list! For the first time in my life, I’m actually interviewing candidates, and it really is eye opening.
A few things to add:
An lunch with people who are at your level is still an interview and requires your best behavior.
If asked about your career goals, pick something that this job could help you work towards. Sounds obvious, but it’s hard to get excited about hiring someone who has the right skills but clearly wants the job just for the paycheck, not because they have any real interest in it.
(Oh, and Ronnie, I do believe I owe you an email– and an article. Working on it!
)
Thanks Terry B! Appreciate your suggestion about using these as a quick pre-interview checklist.
Hey TEB! Great to hear from you. And thanks for adding good interview tips from your own experience. Big smile on my face thinking of you in the interviewer seat now. Yes…we need to catch up. Looking forward to that article. Ahem.
Ronnie Ann
very good tips, very simple but so little people think of that. Though sometimes they have made up their mind allready. I am jobless and have had my fair few of job interviews. This one time they said immediatly that they wanted to hire another and that they thought I was not social and fit for the job. I had hardly introduced myself! Sorry but then I was like whatever. still, if the interview is done the way you would do it then anyone can have a fair shot. Also it helps when you can put volunteerwork on your resume, that proves that you are willing to work and do something for your community without gain for yourself
Hi Redheadlass!
Nice to see you here. Great tip about adding volunteer experiences to your resume. It not only shows there is more to you as a person, but sometimes you can show how you used your talents to their best, such as leading a small project or creating a new improved way of doing things for them.
You’re also right about some interviewers making up their mind from the moment they see you. Hope it makes you feel a little better to know I once went on an interview, and from the moment the guy saw me, I could tell I was not what he had been expecting. And although I usually interview really well, this interview was horrible!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I wish you the best of luck getting a job that’s right for you!
Ronnie Ann
i question the true nature of man? why are the poor left behind? why are the rich only getting richer? whatever happen to the human heart? humanity will succeed or fail as one species.
Although sometimes it may be hiding, I believe the human heart is indeed alive and well in all of us. Perhaps it’s in our power to create the change around us – and let it ripple out.
Peace out and in, truth!
~ Ronnie Ann
Additional comment:
It is also important HOW you answer a question. If you use the word “like” every other word, I (as the interviewer) would think you do not know proper english and would speak this way to customers.
So true Suzanne. Thanks!! Sometimes helps for people to listen to themselves in mock practice interviews. They might get a real surprise!
~ Ronnie Ann
I’m qualified but I didn’t get the job. I was too nervous. It was my first job interview. Although I know I answered the question very well.
I had an interview last week and the moment I met the hiring manager I knew I wouldn’t get the job. She was extremely cold and didn’t have things together. The interview lasted 2 hours (yes, I toward the place and presented my plan). I think I was overly friendly because of her attitude toward me. This is only the second time in my work history that I felt uncomfortable. On the way out of the office she boosted that she had hired everyone there as she rushed me out the door. I knew I wouldn’t be hired. Oh well, I believe if its meant to be, its meant for me! I likely wouldn’t have been happy there.
Boy, I was rushing sorry meant to write toured instead of toward.
Crap…did it again! Sorry for the typos…meant to write boasted instead of boosted. Well I know my resume was free from typos; but my errors here don’t help.
Hi Leebee!
I’m the queen of typos, so no problem there.
Funny thing about interviewers…even if you think you can read them, sometimes things turn out different than you assume. No one speaks to a person for that long unless there is indeed interest. Actually sounds like you handled it well. My personal rule? Do your best; assume nothing; be ready to say yes if you get offered the job and want it.
Good luck! Hope you are pleasantly surprised. Please let us know what happens.
~ Ronnie Ann
Why don’t interviewers have any guts to tell you you don’t have the job? So you call and follow up. They say “oh I have more interviews” or “I’ll let you know by Wednesday” or something, yet they never call you. Well good thing I didn’t get the job. Why would I want to work for a rude person like yourself?
By reading this, I can see many people go through the same I do. I’ve had probably had 40+ interviews and no job offers. I work in the technical creative field. The interviewing ethics have change so much since this economic “armageddon”.
I am really shy, but I think that I aced some of the interviews and still I have been lied to (when I called to follow up they told me that they didn’t hire anyone, and I am still being considered a candidate, but the next day I saw the same ad for the same position I applied for re posted and got an email that they already hired someone!!) Why is this happening? Or others had me do a project and promised employment if they like it… but I not only never got it, but they took it and used it. I am curious how do you deal with “employers” like this?
Hi Jenna and Eve!
Sigh. I really don’t know how to answer your questions or explain the rudeness. It’s not right. I 100% agree.
I wrote this a while back, but it still applies today:
A Plea for Mercy to Human Resource Professionals (and Anyone Else Interviewing People for Jobs)
As for how to deal with those employers…you can’t control what you can’t control. So all we can ever do is focus on finding the good ones (they ARE out there…really) and let the rest attract folks that feel comfortable being treated that way.
I’ve run into lots of jerks. But you only need ONE job. Good luck finding the right one for you.
~ Ronnie Ann
what the heck did all that have to do with the freakin job?!!!
Hi Sue!
Job interviews are about trying to determine if you not only have the skills but would be someone they want to work with. The tips I give help present you in a way that shows your strengths and also helps them see the real person. And attitude is a big part of that.
But of course, these articles only try to help. If they don’t speak to you, definitely look for ones that do. No article can fit all people. As I said, I just try to help based on having successfully interviewed (a ton) and also helped hire a lot of people.
Good luck whatever approach you choose to use!
I have been to many interviews and it seems the only thing that interviewers are interested in is personality, as opposed to whether or not I have the skills and abilities to perform the job. I am so tired of being judged on such a personal level; it seems a bit discriminatory. Because I am not pretty, perky, and extroverted that somehow means that I am not worthy of hiring? Just because I am quiet does not mean that I am incompetent…if anything it should be a good sign (in a work environment I am not going to waste everyone’s time gossiping about pointless nonsense on television the night before).
While in an interview how do I get an interviewer away from such questions of personality and focused on what really matters – skills, knowledge, professionalism, et cetera?
And regarding attire, I have recently moved to CA and been to a number of interviews where the interviewer was wearing jeans. I find this to be completely disrespectful (a sign that they clearly do not value my time). However, I am wondering if I should start dressing a little less formal, maybe lose the suit jacket?
Heather,
After reading about your experience, I’ve decided to share mine. I feel your pain. Like you, I live in CA, people here are very disrespectful (I’ve got similar personality-quiet, shy, hard working). I dealt with interviewers not only wearing jeans, tank top but also hair dyed purple with pierced nose etc. The other “perspective” employer threw my resume in the trash bin, it was first thing I noticed when I sat down.
Bottom line – I think around here -there is no work, help wanted ad postings seem more like a part of their marketing to show customers, that their business prosper!
The interviewing process has definitely changed since the pre-recession days. There is definitely age, nationality, personality, looks discrimination. It’s a personality contest and the lucky people they hire it’s for minimum wage.
Eva,
I’m so sorry the process has been so awful. It really is a tough time for too many people. For some thoughts on the personality question, please see my response to Heather. Best of luck!
Hi Heather!
You helped inspire my latest post: Why Interviewers See Attitude and Personality as Job “Skills”. Hope it offers some insight.
As for trying to get interviewers away from the very things that they are looking for…not a good idea, although I get why you are asking the question. Your best bet is to use it to your advantage by having strong stories that show how you handle work-related situations. As for dress…it really depends on your field. Better to err on the side being well-dressed. without overdoing it. A nice jacket over tasteful professional-looking (but maybe not too fahncy) clothes allows you to remove the jacket if it feels appropriate. As for seeing THEM as disrespectful…you’re the one judging them.
They want you to see the real deal. When I interviewed folks for a university, I dressed as we did normally…no disrespect was ever intended. They want to see the real you…but they also want you to see the real them.
Best of luck!
Hmmmm…..how do you know what they want if they won’t tell you? You are not a mind reader, and unless you are and have these oh-so-wanted magic powers, then by golly what gives?!
Hi Sue!
Good question. No one knows for sure what each and every employer is looking for – not even the employer sometimes!
All you can do is read their job description carefully, spend some time checking their website (if they have one), find people who work there if at all possible, and then do your best to show how resourceful, cooperative, pleasant, dedicated and well-matched to the job you are. I don’t know any employer who isn’t at least looking for that!
Use stories from your past employment/accomplishments to make your case. And use the clues above and from other articles to help. I know it can be really frustrating at times, but your job is out there.
Good luck!