Some bully bosses when they go into rage mode can’t hear anything and are best left alone in the moment. A discussion later will be heard better. But some react well to a person standing up for themselves in the moment. Depends on the level of anger and the particular wiring of both people I think. Unfortunately, to complicate the whole thing, there are also gender issues involved for some folks.

But I agree with you…if it rises to the level of abuse, then a person should do something about it. Even in thinking about this, though, there are personal levels to consider. What to can slide right off one person’s back might feel like abuse to another. In the end, each person has to decide for his or herself.

Thanks for adding good perspective. Oh…and as for blogging wars…if a person feels they are being slandered (as in the case above), I am all for them choosing to simply state their own position loud and clear should they be moved to do so. But if this escalates to the point where each is reading what the other says and then responding until it does become a war and that’s all they are thinking about, then I think all that energy can be applied to much more useful things. In this case, I didn’t get the sense of war as much as free speech. She says it just feels good to have her side known. But I do agree…war is not the answer.

Peace right back at ya, Ruby.

No one else in the company stands up to this guy and none of them get the amount of respect from the boss than my husband does.

Sometimes it pays (pun intended) to stand up for what you believe in – sometimes it gets you fired – but then you can file for unemployment and a whole new life could open at your feet.

I’m a firm believer in any situation in life – DON’T TAKE ABUSE.

As far as having blogging wars with employers and ex-employees, I’d

1. Consider it beneath my level to stoop to someone else’s.

2. Watch my behind because there are laws about slandering and also liabil…(if that’s how you spell it)

PEACE, today. All.

Thank you SOOO much for this comment. I’m going to add a link to the book title. I imagine a lot of people could use that help – whether they are a boss or employee.

So sorry you and your husband had to go through all this. But I LOVE that you decided to fight fire with fire. Hah! That’s the way to go. No one should be held hostage by irrational behavior.

Thanks for reminding me that it’s called “hostile work environment”. I will tell you that unfortunately some HR offices are willing to show a LOT of leeway when the bully boss is an up-and-comer (like the one I had), but as far as I’m concerned no one should have to take that kind of treatment. And I am glad you reminded us that bosses have to take a lot of crap too! (I have many stories to tell on that point, but I’ll save them for another day.)

Thanks again for adding your voice to this important conversation. I wish you and your husband only smooth sailing from now on!

Ronnie Ann

The employee would have public meltdowns and throw tantrums in the office. It was shocking behavior and my husband, her boss, had no idea how to deal with it. My husband would do just back off and keep his head down until days later when she seemed in a better mood. He wanted to fire her, but he found out she was quitting, so he let nature take it’s course.

No one should have to take that kind of abuse at work. In fact, there are laws against it. It’s called a “hostile work environment”. There’s a great book you can read called Dealing With People You Can’t Stand. It helped a lot in our situation.

There’s more…long story short, we found numerous blogs online she had written after she quit. She wrote horrible lies about us. Really ugly stuff. So I decided to fight fire with fire and blog our side. I don’t know if it helps, or not, but it feels good to get it out sometimes.

Good luck and let me know if the book helps you.