I can hear you wanting to tell your “side” of the situation to your boss and the big boss, and I know it’s very important to be heard.

But, at least right now, what really matters – if you want to keep this job – is for you to listen to them. You need to really hear what they are saying to you without trying to defend yourself. What happened in the past is in the past.

The sad truth is that companies need to change direction sometimes to survive. So, the way things were done the last 21 years might not be useful any more because the company has changed.

They have told you that you “do not fit in” now. That’s a pretty clear message from them.

Think of it this way – someone who has lived in Alaska for 20+ years knows how to dress for Alaska’s winters. Then, they move to Southern California where the winters are very different. If they keep dressing in all those layers of warm clothes like they did in Alaska, they will look ridiculous and probably have some sort of medical emergency for being too hot. Because the surroundings have changed, the way they dressed the last 20+ years (when they lived in a different climate) is not appropriate or necessary now. If they don’t change, they “fail” in their new surroundings.

This feels like a similar situation to me. The company – not the climate, in this case – has changed, and you are no longer fitting in with the current climate in this company.

Right now, there are 3 important questions for you to answer:

1. What is the “new” reality at this company right now? What do they need you to do now? How do they need you to change to fit in?

2. Do you want to fit in with the company now? Has it changed so much that you don’t want to work there any more, or do you still like the “new” job?

3. Can you recover this situation? Can you go to your boss and ask her what you need to be doing differently, and then can you do what she has told you she wants?

I agree that you should not put your side in writing to them. If you write to them at all, I would write a letter that tells them you want to continue to work for them and asks them what you need to do to “fit in” now, to succeed in your “new” job.

Re-read Ronnie Ann’s article above, and try listening to your boss with an open mind. Pretend you are starting a new job with the same company, and learn what you need to do to succeed in your new job.

Good luck!
Susan

The 2nd bad review was from her sister, the big boss. After I had tried to explain my side of the situation, it did not matter what I said they didn’t want to hear my side. She said I wasn’t invested enough. I’ve been there for 21 years, I am invested. I would like to write something, but afraid they would fire me on the spot. What should I do?

You say this job is “doing something different than you used to do” so that means you have things to learn. Excellent! You are stretching your capabilities, learning new things, and developing new skills.

So, pay attention to what they are telling you, and learn as much as you can. It sounds like a very good place to work – you have a trainer, and you also have a manager who is paying attention. Even if the trainer is not really patient, having a trainer is a luxury. Most of the time, new employees just get thrown into the job to succeed or to fail on their own. You have help!

So, don’t be discouraged. Just dig in, and show them you can do it! Show your manager she is right to have confidence in you. Go for it!

Good luck!
Susan

Were you able to get any more details out of him about why he feels you did a mediocre job? It must (surely!) be about more than not beating a “very aggressive” project deadline which, I assume, you had little input in establishing. Doing a faster – but poorly done – implementation that beat the deadline would have been “exceeding expectations?” Is that really what he wanted? I don’t think so, but I could be wrong!

Do you have any proof that you did an “exceeds” job on this project? Congratulatory or laudatory emails you could provide to your boss? Do you have any allies in the organization – perhaps some of the regional people or one of your peers (or – very carefully – one of your bosses’ peers) – who could tell your boss, or document in an email to you that you could forward to your boss, about what an extraordinary job you did on this project? Or would that just be throwing fuel onto a fire?

Based on my experience in large organizations, this could be:
* You did it well, and you didn’t need his help.
* Your boss is out-of-touch with what’s really going on in his organization.
* Your boss wants you to move on (are you a threat to him?).
* Your boss is completely clueless.

If you have had a good relationship with him previously and gotten “exceeds” expectations in earlier reviews, perhaps there something else bothering him – something from my list above or something else?

If you can figure out what’s really wrong, you can address it going ahead, but – for this review – I’m really not sure what the best thing is. If the review has already been made a part of your official record, it may not be modifiable. Is there any possibility that someone from HR could help in this situation – or is that not do-able or not practical/acceptable in this organization?

I hope you have an up-to-date LinkedIn Profile, documentation of all your past achievements in this organization, and copies of everything in your personnel folder. Then, I would be seriously considering moving on to find a better situation or, at least, a better boss.

Good luck!
Susan

I am the manager of several groups and this past year I put in 75 – 100 hours a week at work, not because I am inefficient but rather because we are so short staffed my teams can barely keep up. We also went through a full systems conversion to systems that are less automated and require more manual intervention. Several on my team have shown great leadership, several have essentially met the requirements, and of course I have a few that need improvement. I am giving them fair reviews based on their level of performance and they all should feel comfortable with what I am giving them, based on my ratings versus their self assessments.

Here is my problem, my direction is to not give anyone a good review (no need for advice here, I will do the right thing and take whatever punishment I get) and I was informed that I will be getting a met expectations on several major projects I worked on successfully. I met the due date of the project, overcame major obstacles throughout the project, and it was no secret I chose work over my family to complete the project. Now for the real kick to the head, everyone in the organization had the same objective in this project even if they had no involved. I agree they would all get a “met expectations” because they neither went out of their way to help or hinder the project. My level of attention and dedication to the project is what got it done on time. Not to mention all the day to day activities that needed addressed as well. Our top rating says that the employee would demonstrate a high level of self initiative (I never needed direction for this project, I actually set the guidelines for other regions to meet the same project) and demonstrates a high level of dedication to the job. I couldn’t have possibly done more to meet the date of the project, which was a very aggressive date. I don’t understand how this could be rated as “meets expectations”. The only feedback I got was that if I wanted a higher rating I should have beat the expected completion date. This is only one example, but am I out of line? I have plenty of feedback from my peers that says otherwise. My VP is so angry at my self assessment that I don’t even know if I can talk to him further. I feel like I gave of my life to do a great job only to find out that 1 person (my boss) says I did a mediocre job. HELP!!

Can you pick up any hint of the “numskulls” doing this kind of thing to other employees?

The HR staff, if there is one, should be aware and advising in this situation – if they are effective.

My preference would be to wait for my real boss to return and ask her to help you recover from this situation – assuming that she IS returning. However, IF layoffs are pending, you could be in the cross-hairs with this review.

It sounds like you have already discussed going to the higher manager with one of the current bosses, so it may be difficult to back out. Regardless of what the current manager said to you about being “fine with it,” I doubt that they are happy you are planning to do this and may have already put their side forward.

So, I would present my case, as clearly and unemotionally as possible! Use all of your documentation – the list of cancelled meetings. If possible, refute the negative comments point-by-point with facts or other documentation. If you have copies of your old reviews, I would bring them too. These managers could be excused because they were filling in, without real familiarity with you and your work (yes?).

I would not throw around terms like “bad faith” or “numskulls” – regardless of how appropriate you feel they are. I would stick to the facts, pointing out the inaccuracies.

Re-read Ronnie Ann’s post before you go in.

Good luck!
Susan

Before you leave, ask the boss who enjoys having you around for a written recommendation for you to use in the future, and ask if you would be able to use him or her as a reference for your new job search. It’s good to have someone at the old job who can vouch for you and your work.

Also ask if he/she knows a place where you could do similar work, and if he/she knows anyone there you could talk to about a new job. Maybe you’ll get an inside track to a new job. A long shot, perhaps, but worth a try.

Then, do your best to get rid of the anger and hurt so it doesn’t sabotage your job search. Write it all down, cry in the shower, complain to your family and/or non-work friends or whatever works for you. Dump as much of the hurt and anger as you can.

Then, put together your version of what happened. Because you will be asked why you left – everyone is usually asked that question when they interview for a new job. Write it down (and cross out all the names and the bad words), and practice saying it out loud so that you don’t stumble over it.

Your answer will probably be something along the lines of “I had bad chemistry with a supervisor. In the end, it just was not a pleasant place for me to work, so the best option for me was to leave. I learned a lot from the experience, and I don’t plan to repeat it.” All true! Don’t go into any details! Don’t trash your former employer or your coworkers, no matter how tempting it may feel!

Job-Hunt.org’s Job Search Mindset Expert, Harry Urschel, wrote an article that should help you understand how to present this situation in your next interview – How Employers Hear Your True Stories. It’s worth reading, and I think it will help you understand how to manage your response in this situation.

In your new job search, you will be much more careful about the potential work situation and your new co-workers. So, you HAVE learned a lot from this situation, painful as it has been. And, you will probably be happier in your next job.

Good luck!

Cheers!
Susan
Work Coach Cafe Team Captain