I’m so sorry you or anyone has to put up with such abuse in the workplace. There is nothing to justify his behavior and ignorance. It certainly doers not get the best out of his female workers – and it also probably instills a fearful self-censorship in the males, even if they seem to be treated better. The one hopeful thing I see in your words is that there could be another head chef in your future since this is a position with turnover and you have outlasted them all.

It’s a shame that a group of you can’t go to the chef’s boss and bring his abusive treatment into the light. Or go right to him, tell him all together that your goal is to support him as strongly as possible, but you would also like his respect in return since you are doing your best. But as someone who has had some experience with food service (and watched too much of Chef Ramsey), I know this is not the only food industry place where such verbal abuse takes place. And I know prejudice is deep.

If you are unable to speak up / stand up for yourselves and if changing jobs is not possible right now, then I can only wish you that he finds a new job in the new year and a better boss takes his place. Would it be wrong for me to suggest you send his resume to other companies and hope for a win-win?

Please tell your fellow workers I am rooting for a miracle like with Scrooge in A Christmas Carol. And please also tell them not to forget how good they are. Just because he’s a prejudiced bully, doesn’t change who any of you are at the core. It’s about him, not you. If all of you can remember that, even when he’s yelling, then you can get through the day just a little easier.

I wish you all the best, Tyler. Here’s wishing for a much better 2012!

I’m so sorry you have to deal with this kind of workplace environment. You said it so well…it kills creativity. And your point about your company, where it starts at the top, leaves little room for change. Unless the boss realizes that change has to start at the top.

Hope at some point you can find a place that is better at treating its employees with respect. Even if you can’t change yet, now is as good a time as any to start seeing what’s out there and thinking about how you might get to something you would enjoy.

I wish you all the best!

I can see why you feel that way. So sorry. No one deserves to be treated like this in the workplace or anywhere else. I hope your anonymous complaint doesn’t get pinned on you. But I like that you’re looking for a way to stand up for yourself.

While I understand why you don’t want to go to the manager, sometimes there isn’t much else to do. You have a right to speak with her and ask for advice, saying you really want to do a good job and learn how to work with that particular assistant manager. Because the manager likes her, the best approach is not to attack or put the assistant manager down, but to look for practical advice and solutions. If you get a cold shoulder from the manager or the assistant manager is even harder on you afterward, it is probably time to move on. In fact, no matter how bad the economy is, I’d be looking for another job right now, just in case. You shouldn’t have to fear your workplace!

Good luck.

I’m so sorry you’ve had to deal with all this for as long as you have. It sounds horrible. I’ve had a couple of screaming banshee bosses myself, but my choice in each case was to start looking and just do my best until I could get out. It was much easier to smile once I made the decision to leave.

Since it seems like you have nowhere (and no one) to turn to in the company, your thoughts about leaving sound wise – at least worth looking to see what’s out there. And remember when you interview…it’s about finding a better opportunity and NOT how bad the current company is. Dirty laundry stays behind…you move forward.

I wish you much luck finding a better job soon!

Recently I have faced some problems at work where the workplace from the beginning i found very stifling with a boss who had some irrational policies at times and expected them to be followed without questioning. The politics in the office was intense with lots of backbiting due to the insecurities amongst employees – the boss however welsomes the and those who do it are seen as loyal (who report every damn thing to the boss).

All this is actually fine, I have survived it all, however boss’s wife runs a company too – I call her the screaming banshee. Nobody says no to her. She wants things done at the snap of her two manicured fingers and you often find everyone scurrying around to get things done fast! cos of how much they fear her shrill screaming and insulting derogatory remarks. (“Don’t you have a brain???” “why aren’t you answering????”- asked when she looks at your work and shouts “what the hell have you done here??!”).

SO it came to a time when i repeatedly kept getting assigned her work and the stress was overwhelming the work itself is fast paced and honestly the nature of it is not something i liked at all (PR work). Although our boss has been approached with the problems employees face when working for his wife he rarely deals with it brushing it aside with a lame excuse such as ‘you need to toughen up’

Finally i went and told the management i no longer wanted to do that work since i didnt like the nature of work.

I found myself in the dog house.

I have put up with enough of nonsense at this workplace (including working with a friend which ruined the friendship and not to mention how much of the company mascot she became, and although a lot better now there manifests in here quite a few complexes still – even after many promotions.

Its all too much. does anyone have a take on this? I for one am looking for jobs.

No one deserves that treatment. I had a boss like that once (ok…more than once) and I do not consider that acceptable behavior on any level. And yet there are so many bosses like this out there. Grrrr! But thankfully there are also good ones.

As I can tell, you are seeing this in a clear and healthy manner as far. Good luck finding a human boss and a great new job, Tom! Please let us know how things turn out.